


The Winter in Us

by Crimsonyxx



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, X-Men - All Media Types
Genre: 40's bucky barnes and reader, Amnesia, Bucky Barnes Feels, Bucky Barnes Needs a Hug, Bucky Barnes Remembers, Bucky Barnes's Plums, Captain America: The Winter Soldier, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Hydra (Marvel), Lots of time skips, Mutant Powers, Mutant Reader, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Post-Serum Steve Rogers, Post-World War II, Pre-Captain America: The Winter Soldier, Pre-Serum Steve Rogers, Pre-World War II Bucky Barnes, Super soldier reader, Temporary Amnesia, magneto - Freeform, protect bucky at all cost, shitty hydra
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-07-01
Updated: 2016-07-21
Packaged: 2018-07-19 11:17:53
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 4,384
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7359103
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Crimsonyxx/pseuds/Crimsonyxx
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>'You knew him, the anonymous man beside you. You've been on a numerous mission together. But this time, it felt like as if you knew him for who he was, and not just some random soldier on a mission with you.'</p><div class="center">
  <p> ~*~</p>
</div><br/>Being one of Hydra's enhanced super soldier wasn't an easy life. But whenever you looked at him, looked into those sharp blue orbs, you felt at home.<p>Where you're supposed to be.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Intro

**Author's Note:**

> This idea has been in my head for quite sometime and I can't help to write a story for it! Hope you guys like this!
> 
> much love,  
> Bucky and his plums
> 
> ps. I suck at summaries

Steely blue eyes.

Empty and dead.

Disheveled deep mahogany hair.

Flying strands with every move he made.

Body flexing now and then.

Orbs never leaving your figure.

 

Metal arm swung towards you. You ducked. Your body lunged forward, attempting to land a strike to his stomach. The man blocked your attack. Gripping your fist. His knee lifted itself from the ground, aiming at your torso with a deadly force. You immediately moved your free hand to defend yourself. The blow met your open palm. Resulting in a painful ache coursing through it. You bit your bottom lip in response. 

Decided to put your powers to display, sparks of ice staring to form on your locked hand. It wasn’t long until a gush of cold air knocked the man backwards. Forcing him to release your hand. He quickly straighten himself up. Eyes narrowing sharply at your direction. You could felt the temperature around you dropped a few degrees. Indicating your seriousness. But before any of you could launch an attack, someone yelled.

“Enough!”

Both of you halted in your respective position. Unmoving.

“That’s enough, soldier. You may go back.”

You immediately gave a salute to your superior. All the while eyeing the man before you. And so did he. His sharp blue eyes gazing at your form. Studying your figure intently, before his own disappeared into the darkness. 

 

You were soon escorted into another room. Two guards walking side by side, caging you in between. Suddenly, a voice crept into your head.

“Doll.”

You whipped your head abruptly. Stopping dead in your tracks. Eyes darting frantically, searching for the source of the sound. But no one was there.

“What are you doing? Keep walking!” The man shoved your body harshly, making you stumble. You decided to continue walking.

“Doll.” 

Came the voice again. 

You halted. Eyebrows furrowed slightly. It sounded awfully familiar. Sadly, you were given no time to think as a big hand gripped your shoulder painfully, forcing you to continue walking. 

You tried turning your head back once again but to no avail. 

No one was there.

Your head throbbed slightly. But you kept on dragging your feet forward. Finally arriving in the destined room, you were shoved into your seat. Glass slowly engulfed your body and your eyelids fluttered close. Soon a freezing chill wrapped you. 

But before everything went completely blank, the voice came to you once again.

 

“I love you, doll”

 

“Forever and always.”


	2. Mission 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One of your mission with The Winter Soldier! Will something happen?
> 
> Hope you guys enjoy it!! Please let me know what you think!

Snow falling from the sky. Settling gently on your (h/c) locks. Thin air seeped out from your mouth with each breath you exhaled. It’s freezing cold and not to say, dark. But you could see your target clearly. You’re currently atop of an abandoned building, eyeing your prized target as he walked pass the quite night street. Carefully, you took your gun out. Focusing solely on him before finally pulling the trigger. Causing the man to fall onto the ground. Dead. The small crowd around him shrieked in terror. 

Another mission accomplished.

You stood up and turned your back only to be greeted by his masked face. It seemed that he already finished his own mission. The two of you had been assigned in a joint assassination mission. Leaving both of you to work your way together. 

You gave him a nod of acknowledgment before a sudden fuss could be heard from below. You whipped your head abruptly. Pulling out your gun once more. Immediately rising your defense up. Something or someone knew you’re there, and it means that they must be annihilated at all cost.

You rushed towards the stairs, attempting to give yourself a head start. As soon as you ripped the door open, a group of armed men came to your vision. With enhanced power and reflexes, you and your partner launched at an unimaginable force. Leaving your opponents no time to react. Wiping out every single one of them, both of you worked in perfect synch. It wasn’t long before all of them were left limp and unmoving. 

Well, almost.

Out of nowhere, as an act of desperate measure, a man threw a bomb at your direction. Shocked you immediately tried to dodge it all the while making a wall from ice to shield yourself. But the force was too much that your wall started to cracked and before you knew it, strong arms were wrapped around your torso. With a huge force, it pushed you away from the bomb. Making you land on your back with him on top of you. 

You blinked rapidly as the moment passed. Still feeling his firm arms holding your body. The man shuffled slightly before looking at you. His mask already left his perfect sculpted face because of the blast. His aqua blue eyes darted quickly. As if he’s checking that you’re still alive and well. Concern was written all over his face. You could felt his hot breath tickling your face. His nose barely touching your own.

At that moment, you felt as if the time had stopped. Seeing his face up close like this made you realize just how breathtaking the man before you was. Sharp hues staring at your own, lips slightly parted, strong jawline, and deep brown hair framing his face in all the right ways. It was utterly beautiful. You could felt your heart starting to pick its pace up.

But despite all of that, you couldn’t help but to wonder. Why did he shield you from the bomb? He had no reason to. He was not obliged to. 

So why?

Seconds had passed before his own orbs went wide. He immediately retracted his body away from yours. Standing on his feet. 

You sat up slowly. Trying to took it all in. The brown haired man looked quite startled himself, blinking rapidly with unfocused eyes. A crease starting to form on his forehead. 

You tried to calm your nerves down but your mind kept recalling the feeling of his arms around you. And that feeling wasn’t foreign at all. It felt strangely familiar and... comfortable.

Suddenly, a vision flashed through you.

 

A man.

A man was holding you close. Caressing your face ever so gently while planting kisses on your forehead. You couldn’t decipher who he was. His face blurred. As much as you try, you still couldn’t get the whole picture. The only thing that you could muster was his voice. So warm an filled with love.

Unbeknownst of you, a tear rolled down your cheek. Your heart felt like it was sinking, A familiar pain started to swell inside of your chest.

Who?

Who was he?

You looked up to gaze at the man in front of you. Your lips trembled with every word you spoke.

“Who are you?”

 

The man slowly turned his attention towards you. Eyebrows furrowed in complete confusion, he answered;

“I don’t know.”


	3. Mission 2

Your journey back to the base was filled with thick silence. None of you spoke a word. He's driving and you're on the passenger seat. The road was awfully quite. And you couldn't stop your mind to keep wandering. About the man in your vision and about the man seated next to you. You never felt like this before. And it's not like it was the first time the two of you have been assigned into a mission together. You knew him, the anonymous man beside you. You've been on a numerous mission together. But this time, it felt like as if you knew him for who he was, and not just some random soldier on a mission with you. You let out a deep sigh. Your head starting to throb with all the thinking you've been doing. 

You turned your head slightly to gaze at him. To your surprise, he was looking at you. But the moment your (e/c) orbs met his, he immediately changed his focus back on the road. 

Super awkward.

Not knowing what to do, you decided to stay silent on your seat. Moments had passed and still, none of you spoke. But you had to admit, it's not uncomfortable. You knew it wasn't long until you reached the base. And soon you'll be put into the ice again. Normally, you'll just obey everything they told you to. 

But now.. something Inside you refused to go back to that place. It made you utterly confused to be honest. What's happening to you? You let out another exhausted sigh. 

 

The anonymous man beside you seemed to notice your change of behavior, but he made zero comment about it. He himself was immersed into his own jumbled up thoughts. Why was he shielding you? What was the sudden warmth in his chest when he looked at you? He didn't know. He wanted to. But he didn't.

Soon, both of you arrived back at the base. You were greeted with your superior and a couple of doctors. The two of you were immediately separated and led to different rooms. You turned your head to look at him again and noticing that he was doing the exact same thing. 

His orbs held so much emotion. 

So, so much. 

 

It was right then and there that something clicked inside of you. 

You didn't want to go just yet. 

Not yet.

Because you knew after that you'll probably forgot all these feelings you're experiencing right now. 

You wanted to be by his side. 

Just a little longer. 

Just a little bit longer.

As soon as that thought appeared a sharp pain resonated in your head. Making you fell on your knees. Seeing you crumpled to the ground unexpectedly like that startled the brown haired man greatly as he immediately marched forward towards you. It's as if he's moving by pure instinct. However a couple of guards halted him. 

"Leave her alone Soldier. The doctors will take care of her." 

His superior spoke in a demanding tone. The man shifted his sharp hues onto him, glaring holes on his face. 

"There's nothing you can do soldier." 

It took him seconds to realize the truth. His eyes casted downwards before focusing its gaze back to you. He watched as the guard lifted your writhing figure from the ground. And for once in a long time he felt completely helpless. And he despised that feeling very much. Oh how much he hated it. 

Unwillingly, he turned his back against you and started walking away. 

He walked as he failed to notice your desperate whispers towards him. 

 

"Don't leave me." 

 

And after that everything went jet black.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so sorry if the chapter is too short! I'll try to write longer chapters in the future! and please let me know what you guys think! 
> 
> Have a great day~


	4. Mémoire 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well! this chapter wasn't suppose to be released today but I got all exited and released it ahead of time. And as the title suggest, it's a flashback of reader's life back in the 40's hohoho.
> 
> And yes, I changed the summary because it super sucks and i just can't with it? Anyways, I hope you guys enjoy this!

Loud music reverberated across the room, people chattering here and there, laughing all the while, warm atmosphere filling the air. 

Nothing was more perfect than this moment. 

Except you were there not to enjoy it. 

It was a complete mess inside the diner. You were working as one of the waitress and the crowd was just super crazy today. You're literally serving them non-stop. You didn't even have time to catch your own breath. It’s starting to drive you crazy.

Just when you thought you could rest for a little bit, the bell on the front door rung loudly, indicating a new customer. You immediately stood up. 

"Welcome sir and ma'am. A seat for how many?" 

In front of you, stood a skinny blond man, who kept fidgeting from time to time. Which was a rather unusual sight. You've never seen a man so small. Even smaller than you. 

"For four people please." another man spoke. 

This one was obviously tall and extremely charming. With sharp features decorating his face and a well built body. Women would just flock to him like bees. Hell, even you’d flock to him.

Shoving your thoughts away, you led the group to their seats. Once they're seated you gave them the menu. The blond man muttered a hushed thank you while the other man literally beamed it to your face. You just smiled and waited for their orders. 

"I'll have a one set burger with a milkshake." the tiny man spoke. 

You gave a nod and wrote it down on a paper. 

"Anything else?"

"Oh I'm so confused. What should I get, James?" 

Oh. So, the charming handsome man name’s James. You should write that down.

“Hmmm... I don't know, doll. Maybe you could ask the lady about her recommendation?" 

Immediately after that the woman's face contorted into one filled with disappointment as she asked you. 

"What is this diner's top favorites?" 

"We got our famous burger set with french fries and cheese. But if you want we serve salads too. Fresh from the farms" 

"Oh just get me the burger" she spoke indifferently. 

Losing interest on the food huh. 

"James! They sell juices too! Which one do you want?" Another woman asked him. 

"Hmm... That plum one looks good!"

"Okay, one plum juice please!" She chirped, overly happy.

You nodded as you wrote the orders down. After writing all of it, you gave one last smile before excusing yourself. From what you saw, you could tell that the meeting was supposed to be a double date. 

Well a failed one at that. 

Because from every perspective you looked, the two women only spoke with the man they called James. Leaving the tiny blond man from the conversation. You kinda sorta felt bad to the man. Even when the one named James talk to him, you could saw the disapproval in the women's eyes. 

Scrunching your lips, you asked the chef to add more milkshake for the man. Hoping it'd cheer him up a little bit. You hated seeing other people in that kind of situation. Because you knew how it feels all too well. 

When the food was finally hot and ready, you hurriedly delivered them to their table. 

"Four set of burger, a salad, a plum juice, and an extra milkshake for you, sir!" 

You placed the beverage In front of him. His blue eyes shot up to you in confusion. 

"But I didn't order any extras?" 

"Don't worry, sir. It’s on the house." you explained before excusing yourself. 

After walking a few steps you stole a glance back at the table to see the blond man smiling slightly. It's a success! Your own lips quirked upwards unconsciously upon seeing that. 

You're about to look away when your eyes caught the James guy staring at you. His face was filled with awe and... surprise? You couldn't really tell. But what you could tell was the flutter of your heart when he did that. You decided to pretend not to notice his stare and looked away. 

Time flies as you’re serving dozens of customers. Literally every five minute there would be someone to call you. Asking for this and that. But even amongst the racket, you didn’t miss the occasional glance the charming guy would give you. He’d drink his juice and his eyes went to yours. He’d talk to the women and his gaze would go to your direction. 

Why did you know all of this you ask?

Because obviously, you’re not paying extra attention to him.

Definitely not.

Nope.

~*~

After what seemed like forever, you finally had the time to flop down and rest. You sighed contently as you sat. God it felt so good. Your legs were so sore right now. You rubbed them gently in an attempt to calm your muscles down. You swore you’d give yourself a good night sleep when you went home later today.

It wasn't even a minute after you sat when a loud wheeze could be heard. Even in the music on that sound was as clear as broad daylight. Maybe it's because you've heard it too often. It’s like an alarm to you. 

You turned your head left and right and spotted a fuss at one of the table. 

It's the tiny blond man! It looked like he was having a coughing fit. A terrible one at that. Okay, an awful one. You immediately stood up to get some warm water and hurriedly went to the man. 

"Are you okay, sir?"

You offered him the glass which he took gratefully all the while hitting himself on the chest. His friend, that James one looked so worried, he patted him on the back a few times and gripped his shoulder.

“Steve? You alright?”

The man called Steve nodded, but still coughing loudly.

It took quite a long time for him to wind down. Which made you so anxious. You just stood there chewing on your lower lip as the scene unraveled itself.

When the situation finally calmed down, you let out a relieved sigh. 

“Is there anything more I could do for you sir?” you asked worriedly.

“No. Thank you so much. Sorry for the trouble.” The Steve guy gave you an appreciative look and smiled. You returned one at him.

“Not at all, sir. Well, if you’ll excuse me.”

Before you could go back to your station, the brown haired guy spoke

"Wait. I wanna pay." 

"Alright. I’ll bring the bills here for you, sir." 

"No no. Just show me the cashier." The man stood up as he spoke.

“Buck, I can pay for my own.” Steve protested.

“You can pay me later, brother. Just focus on calming down for now.”

“But-“

He gave him one last warning look and Steve huffed, clear annoyance written on hi s face, but he didn’t move from his seat.

“Right this way, sir.”

You walked with him following you from behind. 

"Thank you for that." 

"It's my pleasure sir."

"No. Really. Thank you." You raised an eyebrow at his statement.

"You're welcome I guess?" 

He chuckled at your reply. Your heart fluttered again at the sound of it. 

"What's your name, ma'am?" The man asked. 

Your eyes went slightly wider as you looked at him, startled. It took you a couple seconds before finally answering.

"It's (y/n)." 

"(y/n)... beautiful name. Well mine is-" 

"James. I know. Those women literally scream your name every five seconds." you stated. Now it’s his turn to be wide eyed from your sudden cheeky remark. Well, at least he knew that you’re also paying attention to him. And that made him felt really good in a way.

"Well they also call me Bucky." He chuckled again before paying for the bills. 

"I guess I'll see you again soon?" 

"I'll be right here, sir" 

"Oh please, just call me Bucky." 

He flashed one last smile and with that, he left. Leaving your face steaming hot and red.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so according to the wiki, In French culture, the word mémoire, as in un mémoire ("a memory" - indefinite article), reflects the writer's own experiences and memories. 
> 
> And I thought it was just perfect. 
> 
> Andd, this chapter was one of my fav to write because Bucky and reader's interaction duh!! Actually the first time they actually met. It's a fun chapter, altho I have to re-write things here and there to match the scenario? Also, smol Steve made his first appearance here! (and Buck's little plums) I really like the idea of him and the reader being friends! 
> 
> Please let me know how you guys think! suggestions for future chapters are also welcome!


	5. Mémoire 2

It was a nice evening in the city of New York. Work wasn't so bad and everything actually went smooth for once. You were busy scrubbing the tables before a loud jingle could be heard. You snapped your head, looking for the customer. 

Almost instantly, steely blue orbs met your own. Your face immediately lit up. It's your favorite guy in the world. The man flashed a thousand watt smile at your direction as he walked towards you. 

"Working hard, doll?" 

"Well of course I am. Please have a seat, Mr. Bucky." He chuckled at your remark. 

"I told you, just call me Bucky."

"It would be very inappropriate for me to call a customer without a title, Mr. Bucky." You smiled playfully. He returned it with a raise of his eyebrow, lips still curled up all the while. 

The two of you had grown so much closer ever since the first time you met, which was almost 2 months now. Bucky wasn't joking when he said he'll see you soon because literally 3 days after that, he went back to your place, bringing along his blond tiny fella, who introduced himself as Steve Rogers. The two of them were friends since childhood and in your opinion, it’s just super cute. Bucky was like his mother, constantly worrying about his tiny friend. “You’re not overworking yourself right?” or “Don’t forget to drink your medicine.” and the same thing along the line. The man called Steve was really kind himself. He kept thanking you for your actions back then when the two of them came for the “double” date thing. Despite his small stature and tiny built, Steve was a true gentleman. The three of you just clicked together. It just happened. 

But even though you adore your skinny blond fella, you just couldn’t help falling for him. 

Yes him. 

James Buchanan Barnes.

That man was something different. His everything made you a total mess. You tried not to take it seriously at first because at that point, you didn’t really care about men. Of course you’re attracted to them, but you’re not thinking of a having a serious relationship yet. You’re more focused on work and money for your living, and other things as well. 

But oh boy, did he make you think twice about it. His sweet demeanor towards you, his attention to you, and the time he’s willing to spend just for you made your heart weak. And long story short, Bucky had been constantly meeting you since then. Sometimes he brought Steve with him, sometimes he didn’t. Although lately, he often came alone. Which obviously, you didn’t mind at all.

"So, you're having the usual today?" 

"Yea. And please give me an extra. Feeling super deprived right now." 

"Hard day at work?" Bucky nodded while sighing loudly, but the smile never really left his face. 

"You wouldn't believe me if I told you, doll." 

"Really? Enlighten me then." His smile instantly grew wider upon hearing that.

"After I give your orders of course." 

"Hm. Absolutely" 

You thanked the heavens because the diner wasn't cramped with customer today. It was times like this that you enjoyed the most. You hurriedly went to his seat after placing his orders. Eager to hear his stories. 

"So where were we?"

~*~

Hours flew in a flash when you're talking to him. All you knew was the sky already turned dark blue by the time he finished. And that means, it's the end of your shift for today. You changed into your regular clothes before saying goodbyes with your co workers.

Your face radiated with intense happiness. Bucky just offered himself to walk you home. Well it's actually not the first time he did that, but you savored the moment so much. The both of you barely had any time to spend with each other, beside him meeting you on your work hours. And with him working all day elsewhere didn't really help either. Even if the two of you weren't official yet, you enjoyed his company. No. You loved his company. Nothing made you happier than being with him. And of course, Bucky felt the same way. His decision to visit you again that day didn't fail him one bit. And he was grateful for that. 

The two of you walked side by side. Chatting about all sorts of things. Even the dumbest one. Your walk was accompanied with laughter and smiles. Time seemed to fly so fast when you're with him. You didn't even realize that you're already in front of your apartment door.

"Thanks for walking me home." 

"Anything for you, sweetheart." he grinned. 

You answered by nudging his sides playfully, smile still plastered on your face. 

"See you soon, Buck." he nodded lightly while stuffing his hands into his pockets.

However, before you could enter your apartment, he spoke again. 

"Are you free next week?" 

You turned your back to face him. His face was slightly tinted with the color red. 

"No but I guess I could ask for a day off. I haven't use it since forever. Why?" 

Upon hearing that, his smile grew wider and his face literally lit up. 

"Great! Tell me your schedule when you know it okay doll?"

"Sure but why? Is there something important?" 

"Oh my doll. There is. There's gonna be something important." 

When he said that you finally came to a realization. He was asking you for a date! A date! Oh gosh how can you be so dumb! Your first official date with Bucky! You could hear the church bells ringing in your head. You immediately nodded your head vigorously at him. He laughed at your response. The sound of it sending butterflies to your stomach. 

Before you knew it, a kiss landed on your left cheek. Your eyes widened in pure surprise. Your thoughts came to an abrupt halt. The kiss lasted only for a millisecond before Bucky retracted himself and started running away, all the while yelling; 

"Don't forget to let me know!" with a flushed face, a huge grin still apparent on his feature. 

And with that he vanished from your vision. Disappearing into the crowds. You brought up your hand to touch the lingering kiss he left behind. Your face getting warmer and warmer. You murmured a faint "I will" unconsciously. 

Almost immediately, you sprinted into your apartment and into your room before finally giggling like a mad schoolgirl. Your hands still plastered on your cheeks, smiling ear to ear.

You couldn't wait for your first date.

~*~

Finally, the day has come. The day of your first date with Bucky. The man was already waiting for you at the destined place. Smile decorating his flawless face. His thoughts were filled with all sorts of plans for today. Taking you to an amusement park at the morning and bringing you into a dinner and ended for a dance late in the night.

Just perfect. 

His lips curled up even more when he imagined how your face would look like upon seeing his surprises for you. That made him more and more impatient. 

He couldn't wait to see you. 

But it also made him equally anxious. He's planning to confess his feelings for you today. He had to. He just couldn't bury it in the dark anymore. He could only hope that you felt the same way. Because from his observation, you certainly does. And he needed to confirm it himself. Whether it’s only his imagination or if it’s really true. 

Sighing, Bucky raked his fingers through his hair, chewing his lips slightly. The beating of his heart became more and more erratic every passing minute. 

“Deep breaths Buck, deep breaths.”

Chanting encouraging words to himself, he waited for your arrival. 

He waited and waited. 

 

But you never came.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for ending the chapter there! I couldn't think of any better way to end this soo... yeah! And this was also one of my favorite chapter to write because who doesn't like fluff (esp 40's Bucky fluffs). 
> 
> Let me know what you guys think! And don't forget to have an awesome day!

**Author's Note:**

> sorry for any grammatical errors and typos! Constructive critics and suggestions are always welcome!


End file.
